Saturday, 9 May 2015

Life 17 - The Fragility of Self Worth

Coming home from the art gallery with the piece of work which didn't make it into the Open Competition (I submitted 2) got me thinking about how we value ourselves and how important it is to feel positive about yourself.

Typically for me, my personal reaction when I received the phone call telling me that I'd got into Leamington Open, wasn't "oh, how wonderful" but immediately, "what's wrong with the other piece!" Of course rationality and perspective stepped in and I smiled at my dafter self.

But, it's an important point.  How much of our success in life in whatever field relies on us feeling positive and good about ourselves? Melancholy is often given as a driving force for art, as is anger, sadness, grief, and jealousy, (among many) but underneath it all, I wonder if there's a layer of self worth cushioning the negative blows.

So, in the 10 minutes it took me to walk back from town, Life 17 was born.  The Fragility of Self Worth. I know exactly what I want it to look like and I just need a willing model!!  Don't you just love a "ping" moment?

What I also decided was that my painting is boring, and would be much better if I took more risks.  Mitochondrial Roots marked the beginnings of this shift, and I now want to push on even further if I can.


  1. Looking forward to the "push"!

  2. Oh yes, those ping moments - often coming while walking with the brain chomping away unbidden. I love that you are never satisfied, but able to honestly assess your work and always looking to improvement no matter how good the current piece may be. It is a funny thing how the brain snaps into indignant questions too - I catch myself doing that a lot. Take a breath and as you say, let the rational part reinstate.

    This sounds like another really interesting topic to explore. I've not bought into the "need for angst to create real art" thing, although some of my work does come out of grief, or better stated, is part of the grieving process. I'm not sure I know the answer to your question about what lies underneath. I'm not sure I've felt any cushioning of the kind you imply. Maybe I will see it as this quilt progresses.

    In the meantime, you might find this of interest. I've been trying to figure out a place to share it, can't quite make a blog post of it at the moment, but I think it is something important to consider, something I'm having a little trouble getting my head around. It might have something to do with self-worth...

  3. The image is very powerful, Annabel.